Promise Me... Be strong!

Oh gosh.. the tumor is getting bigger, even after the 10 times of therapy it doesn't goes off. How can the poor old man take it, another round of stronger therapy? Oh it's really very demoralised, I know he thought he can make it, he wanted to make it. It's sad to see that the hair starts falling, and losing of weight, guess anyone who saw the poor old man will feel the pain. And you are telling me that the new therapy is going to affect his vision, hearing as well as weakening of his mobility. I can imagine how is yr reaction when the doctor inform you. I know u are upset, I know u wished that you are the one who is suffering, you don't even have to tell me that u are almost in tears when u saw him struggling to sign on the document.... I understand and i felt the same way too when i read yr sms... Please do as I say, be strong, try to spend more time wif him, he have got a lot to tell u, I won't do it on his behalf, U have to sound him out, have a man's talk wif yr dad.

Oh.... I wanted to cry... whay must all these happen to you... promise me, u will be strong...

What's wrong with ME???

Sigh.. one minute I was so happy that he remembered to get me something when he is oversea, the next moment, I was so disappointed when she mention that the gift was given to me becos she "DON'T WANT".... walau yeh.. i hates it when people say this way. Of course I'm not that stupid to fall into her trap, no matter what, I'm always strong in front of her, I won't let her see thru me, she will never be able to read my mind. I'm sure she was disappointed when she saw that I don't feel anything at all? I guess so... why shld I show in front of her? Actually it does HIT me at that very minute.. but must be cool and calm mah... In fact I wanted to run to him & "confront" him, and I know if I were to do so.. What will he tink of her... she wanna test me, I'll prove her wrong, I'm pretty confident that end of the day,the loser is her, this kind of politic... is chicken feet to me.

I know he is not in a good mood last nite, his face was black when he came, so is she.. must be she irritates him again, and kena from him.. so end up spoil their day. I took the opportunity to chat wif him when i see his face gets better. I asked him how come he didn't give the necklace to her, and me instead? guess what's his answer? " chay.. I never promise her anything, but i did promise U that I'll get u a same necklace as mine, so of course, for u only! & why didn't u wear, u want me to put on for u? Hey, it's real gold leh.. now u know i'm almost broke.. i still buy for u.. u better put it on! " hahahahahahaha... U see, thou i only know him less than 2yrs.. I know him well... he is not that kind of person she said... She xiao... tot like that can break the 2 of us up... wait lor.... wait long long....

btw.. to my surprise, my hubby a bit pissed off by her too.. he say she oso one kind.. not an angel at all... desperate, but wanna act cool... She speak ill behind His back too.. and I dunno what else she told my hubby.. so now, my hubby say.. she is not that wonderful too... Ermmmm I told him before!

BUAY TAHAN

I'm pissed off.. mad.. angry.. really... "Buay Tahan" (aka 'can't stand it).

got tis aunty, who always come to our "hq", she is selling vegetarian food at a hawker centre and almost every week she will bring us food she made, such as little cakes or noodle etc.. SHE WANNA Bring, we DIDN"T ask for it. No doubt it's delicious... So she ask my hubby to help her clean her sign board at the stall, my hubby says OK. He went down after she close shop and do the cleaning for her.. mind u it's FOC! this hubby of mine is typical, he felt bad since aunty always cook for us, it's not nice to charge her, take it as a "repayment" for her kindness... OK.. i respect tat. Yet.. last nite she came down to our place, and tell my hubby off.. Sucks rite.. she say " aiyo, u didn't climb all the way up hor? the top very dirty leh.. that where i need yr help, ya lah.. the rest of the side u really do it very clean.. but still i can reach them wow, the VIP part is the top" then she look at me... " aiya.. yr lau gong really "mei you yong" (aka: useless) lah.. ask him do a little thing oso dunno" walau "A".. at that moment, ok I quote what my hubby says " OH dear.. lao po I can see FIRE in yr eyes".. i look.. in fact STARED at her very and say in a very COLD tone " If my hubby is useless, all of you here is RUBBISH"... then i walk off . I know my hubby was PISSED off too.. i oso can see his face changed.. so i gently walk back to him and give him a pat on his back.. poor boy... Mooooo... how can she say such thing! it's F.O.C leh...

Anyway.. my hubby oso Kena from me on the way home.. must educate him lah..

He grumble to me " wow.. help her yet not even a thank you, next time ask her wait long long.. i see she always bring food so i wanna be nice etc....... So i tell him, he shouldn't have do it free, she wanna bring food to pray pray, and for us to eat, is her problem, if u do it once, she will expect the 2nd,3rd time etc... and I don't like to talk to her, cos i know she oso one kind, she just want "something" in return, be it in any kind.. if she ask u for something, and can't get, she will show u face, i saw it b4 when master came, she did it to 1 of our friend.. so.. from then, i can't be bother to talk.. guess she had a shock when i look at her & open my mouth.. i seldom talk in front of her. she dunno who am i that's why.. see if she dare to "bully" my hubby or not.. i'm famous of being sarcastic and cruel to ppl who bully my hubby.. she sld have ask around b4 humilating my dear dear...

Invisible twins

"She" ever comment that she like the korean show "stairway to heaven". It's only yesterday that I realised the reason why? I guess she saw herself in the show. That "evil" step-sister, Youli. It's not that she is as evil as her, but i really can see the shadow in her. I decided to list it down.. for reading pleasure.

1. Both of em are pretty, sweet, innocent looking... a little spoilt... but then cum on lah.. they aren't as innocent as what ppl see.
2. Both love BLINDLY... they jolly well know that their man doesn't 100% belong to them, at times treating them like dirt, in fact, they mean nothing to the man, but they still try all means to "cling" onto the man, even if they have to "cheapened" themselves.
3. Seems like their man had cast a spell on them. they are like robots.. Man want them to cry, they'll cry, want them to smile, they'll smile. They'll juz sit at home waiting for the man to call.
4. They have no friends....... The man is the one and only.
5. Both dying to get married. And they know, even if the man agrees to marry them, it becos of family pressure.

Sigh... ????????? why like tat?? Where's yr brain????

Marriage life isn't everything, it's not always as sweet as a lollipop, it's not always living in the merry go round... It's Realistic...

An Old Man's Greatest Wish

He is a very cheerful old man, cute and "loud" man before cancer strike him. How can one still be as cheerful as before when he has to go thru all the therapy and surgery, It's simply impossible lor... And worst of all, the demise of his beloved daughter. All mishaps seems to come at the same time. He told me, he can't write, or else it's gonna be a very interesting book, a book abt his life. Perhap we can say he is a very "suay" person, for the last 60 years, many things happened.... and it goes...
4yrs old - Almost drown in indonesia sea. His family are fisherman, he spent his childhood days in the kelong.
12yrs old - can't make it to primary sch, no interest, took bus to kota bahru, looking for job, alone.. Old gosh, where were we when we are 12?
20 yrs old - married to a M'sian lady.
21 yrs old-1st daughter was born. Can't even afford a chicken for the wife's confinement. basically take up every job he can.
22yr old - 2nd daughter was born. As usual, life is hard, but got link up with some indons, some biz dealing was negotiated, at least the family need not starve.
23yrs old- youngest son was born. Life isn't any better cos not much biz, hence got to work as a driver.
24-40yr old- Biz prosperous, coy turnover at least 1m.Children was ferried by cars to and fro school. All the three children was sent to local university and states for study. Houses and cars gets bigger. Brought his 1st Mercedes.
42yrs old - Had a very bad car accident.. Mercedes was crashed badly, unrepairable condition. suffer internal injuries, thought he will die, but he SURVIVED.
42-60 - Prime time. The only regrets.. NO communication between father and children. Nothing is important than making $$. He will give his children all the best he can, but too many entertainment, too frequent flying, drift the family apart. He did hanky panky outside and was caught by the wife... That's one of his regrets in life too. It's a "minus" point..
61 yrs old - Economy down turn, he decided to wind up his biz and enjoy his golden age. At least 5million of asset. To everyone's surprised, his kidney failed to "work". He needs a operation immed in order to save his life, he need to remove one of his failed kidney. He don;t even have time to think, he was worried, he need time to be with the family, he needs time to settle his coy, he has lots of things to be done, he need to pull thru, he can't fall. The sickness almost killed him, but he survived.
62-65yrs - Enjoying life, takes everyday as his last day, time was spent on holiday, and relaxing.
66yrs - Lost his daughter in a disaster, worst, cancer strike him. A cancerous lump was found on his neck. The bones around him was "cracked" he need a "neck Ban" to support his neck, in case it breaks! He need to go thru chemo and suffer the agony of the lost of his daughter. Both incident knock him out. He became depressed and he really aged overnight. He show signs of growing senile, and everyday the son prayed so hard for his recovery.
67 yrs - The lump on his neck was gone! The daughter's case a closure.. His appetite gets better, he is happier, he is willing to walk out of the house. Yet... the scan shows that the cancer went into his brain! Oh Gosh.. he need to go for radiation and that mean his hair will drop and he has to go thru another rounds of suffering... But I guess he is taking all these very well, thou it really hurts me when I see hair on his shirt and his head getting bald... I felt so painful when he told me he had a shock one morning when he was combing his hair, a whole batch of hair came off... Argggggg.... Why???????
The only wish he has now is to be able to tell all these to his son. It's not a complete version of what he told me, it's only part of it, but he really hope one day he can sit down and have a good chit chat time with his son, his only son. He wanted to tell the son the following:

"Son, I'm sorry if I didn't pay attention to you when u are a child. Maybe u juz wanted a dad who can play with you, not a workaholic dad.

Perhap when u ask me for money to buy something, u actually wanted me to ask what u wanna buy, instead of a dad who just issue u a chq & chase u off.

I'm sorry that I betrayed yr mum once, it's once &only. I'm sorry abt it cos I know it's a big impact to all of you. I'm a coward, I shld have apologized 20yrs ago, but I was too proud to do it.

I'm sorry if I have given the 3 of you too much pressure in yr studies. How can I, who was illiterate, expected so much.. But I juz want all of you to bear in mind.. yr knowledge is yr asset, no one can take it away from you.

Last but not least..... I LOVE ALL OF YOU. Forgive me! my wife, my daughters and my son...... I'm Sorry!!!"

I'm really Proud of the old uncle! All of us know "Sorry seems to be the hardest word", but I know he will have the chance to tell his son. He wanted to apologise to his "lost" daughter, it's not too late, I know she can hear us, and she will forgive her dad.

St@irw@y To He@ven

Oh Gosh... I cried last nite.. when i look into his eyes.. He is not handsome, but there is something in him.. I dunno how to describe.. Oh God.. He is so deeply in love with her. The worst way to miss someone is to be sitting right beside them,knowing you can't have them. But there is no way u can give him/her up even if u thought he/she is done. How can a man's eye be so watery? I can really feels the pain in his heart! Can puppy love last forever? Yes, when u found someone u really love...
Aiya.. don't be mistaken, I was moved to tears by the lead characters from the korean show " Stairway to heaven" .. The actor was marvellous.. he really potraited the character so well, I know it's juz a show, another drama depicting the struggles that young adults encounter in the face of their destinies, JUST a heart-wrenching love story that reveals unique values that the characters have about love. It's D*mn touching. Guess this will be another korean series beside "winter sonata" that caught my eyes. But no doubt, korean show is pretty draggy...

I wish I could.......

Went wif An, to the fortune teller last sunday. I didn't want to be read cos i have my own Master. Yet after An finished, the lady ask me & my hubby to sit down, so out of curiosity, both of us sat down and let her read. Well, I shld say it's pretty impressive, she got the point! A point which Sooooo Many master had told both of us abt my Hubby. "His family (not me lah) like his parent and siblings will only get close to him provided he is Rich"! hahaha.. it's Bl**dy true... almost all master said the same thing. Both of us has alot in common, according to the lady, we were born in the year of rabbit and time of rabbit, which is pretty rare and best of all, we are husband & wife, so we will be Very Loving :) But we have alot of burden cos We are born on the "emperor's shoulder"?????!!!! Ok lah.. me really had a hard time these 3-4yrs.. But it's ok, must be hopeful! Tmrw will be better!!!! Oh Ya, tat aunty said he will be "rich", real rich in 7yrs time.. so... I better standby my safe box to keep all the $$$, aiya, forget to ask aunty, what abt me?? But never mind, what is his is mine too.. never mind, it shld be given and not asked! Oh ya, she said I got very good Career Lines.. Ok lor... not too bad lah.. And hor we will have 2children leh... Yucks.. tat's nvr in my plan! heeee i'm wondering sekali she see 2 in my hubby and none in me, how har??? I'll kill him & make him confess where the 2 come from!!!! hahahaha... Next yr is the best time for us to have BBs... better don't let the grass grow.

Last but not least... A piece of advice from the aunty.. In order for me to be happy, I must learn how to "Let Go".. learn how to forgive & forget..... I wish I can... There's so much things which I Maybe able to Forgive, but not Forget.

I'll be as lazy as a PIG soon...

I'm serious.... I'm goin crazy sooner or later, or i'll turn myself into a pig soon... at this kind of working environment. U know, life is so switch off.. i report to work in the morning, take my own sweet time to buy and eat my breakfast, sometime can have official copi time wif my superior.. then lunch time, like today.. it's 2hr of lunch leh... can drive out and eat anything i want, of course wif my supt.. so can dili deli.. then by the time i reach office it's 3pm. So i do my dispatch and it takes another 45min.. why take so long, walk walk see see lor... then it's almost 4pm.. and i juz action action do some filing and typing, another 30min passed... and now i'm spending my time blogging. Mind u, i work 5days a week, abt 44hours.. yet i guess WORK, real WORK is only abt 20hours.. other than tat it's either dreaming or playing games, or blogging... gossiping... sigh.. i feel bad like tat, but wat to do... I wish i can be like last time, really work... at least 35hours working, 5hours lunch and the bal 4hours relax.. tat will be most ideal.

Bre@d & Burger

Had chicken sausage,bacon wif egg omelette burger at BK for breakfast & lunch was Honey Oat bread with cheese,veggie,bacon and ham @ Subway.. Well i don't mind even if i have to eat bread for my 3 meals.. I LOVE Bread... No cookies and biscuit please, unless I don't have a choice. My dad always grumble when he see me taking bread, well, old folks always believe kids grow with Rice Rice Rice, even my sis and best friends always tease me " u shld marry a baker, then u will have supplies of bread EVERYDAY".Well, i really don't mind, but too bad, i never got the chance to know guys who are in bakery line.. I mean i use to work in a cake factory, but the bakers there..hmmmm cannot make it lah! Thou the Ang Moh boss love bread, but he can't bake leh.. so we only ended up as BEST Friend / Bosom Friend.
Oh come on lah.. why am i talking abt food now?? i shld be talking abt BED.. I'm damn sleepy, probably becos heavy lunch.. Shhhhhhh no more food... i'm falling asleep... zzzzzzzz I wanna go home....

Love is never equal to Committment

"You can conquer almost any fear if you will only make up your
mind to do so. For remember, fear doesn't exist anywhere except in the
mind"

I would very much like to share the above wif my colleague & Girfriend. They broke up few months ago, I've heard the story from my GF and i've blog abt it too. Today i managed to find out the other version. I guess it's the fear of the two which lead them to the broke off. The man feared that he is unable to provide for her and unable to handle his financial problem, (well i wouldn't want to dig what kind of $$ problem he has). He is worried that if he "say Yes", he will need at least a sum of money to get married, to standby for the child., (he knows tat she wanted a BB Very much) He is worried that at his age, he don't have a chance to see his child grown and he has to work even harder to earn more. He is stressed that he has to report every night, even thou they are not married yet, wif his busy schedule, thou both in the same line, she don't seems to understand. He felt that the GF is not willing to listen and understand him, he is tired after a hard day, yet reporting is a MUST. Therefore, he decided to break off and never wanted to contact her, he feared that SHE will get the wrong idea and put in her love again, whereby he know that he can't commit anything for the time being. He told me : Hey, who wouldn't want to have a family, who wouldn't want to have a partner who can share, but since i have no confident i can be a good husband/dad who can provide for, don't waste her youth".

It takes two to make the relationship work. It takes time to understand the needs of your partner, it's never a easy task. The three P's of success in relationship

Passion , Persistence and Patience.