Happy Birthday To "Him"

I'm a Devil, I guess. I've been missing the same old person again, that one and only.

23rd April was his birthday and I told myself I will send him a birthday card. That's it, anonymous card, don’t sign just use the same nick which I used to call him, hopefully he can still remember no one else except for me uses that name. Registered post, yes, registered post so that the card will reach him. She is not stupid, if she received a card addressed to him, she might not give it to him, she might just throw it away and she will go bonkers again. I'm not trying to have anything with him again, I only want him to know that there is someone out there who still remember his birthday, who is still thinking of him after 10 years. I don't want anything from him at all.

Well, I didn't get the card, didn't send at all, not at all. Maybe I'm just afraid that he might have already move on and might have forgotten about me, so why should I disturb his life and causing him to be assailed with doubts again. I was angry with him and left him 10 years ago because I know he can't commit to me and I know he was upset and heart broken that I betrayed him, and despite him trying to hurt himself, I make no returns and walk out of his life. There is really no reason for me to send him a card NOW.

It's God's will, that we shall never get to meet one another, we are so near, yet so far. It's all fated that we will never be together in this life.

Love is like quicksilver in
the hand.

Leave the fingers open and it stays. Clutch it, and it darts away.